The Korean Sisters

Of late, O Bar has been the preferred choice, we've already had a couple of good nights there so we're spending Friday there too.

We got there late and headed up to Dbl O. Nice crowd so far. This chick at the bar with a jug of lychee martini is hot and we started making some small talk about the cost of it and if it was any good. New gal catches our attention. She had huge boobs with an equally wicked dress that was sending out "please look at my cleavage" SMS. The guys within a 5 metre radius obviously received it because everyone was trying hard not to stare.

We bought beer, SOTB (sex on the beach--> also to be read as ‘awful tasting cough medicine’), about 4 jugs of whiskey dry and vodka Ribena, some tequila shots. It was a concoction for disaster that only the poor crowd there could drive this expedition into the annals of ‘Worst Clubbing Experience’.

We headed down and entered what seemed like Bangra night. LB spotted this girl he saw on wed and we moved in to talk to her. Next thing I know, Dek was standing with us and mumbling some gibberish to them. Apparently, they are Koreans. Dek said something about language barrier and since my knowledge of anything Korean is limited to Kimchi and the beef hotplate, I passed.

Soumi started dancing with these two gals/women. None of them are attractive but because alcohol is a social integrator, we entertain anyone who tries to break into our group.I the more attractive one had on some zebra printed dress, had ample curves but her eyebrows were too drawn too short that it looked like she ran out of pencil at mid eye.

Zebra was however disregarding etiquette and was grinding Soumi like sandpaper on wood. She flicked me on my chin for pouting and this was when I was at mid-thoughts on deciding if I should wing for Soumi on her friend. She complimented, "so cute" and suddenly, I was prepared to overlook her short eyebrows.

LB was still caught up with the two Korean girls and he goes outside with them. I headed out to find him when the place closed and he said something about Hard Rock. I did a mental assessment.

It was 3am and at a period where clubs in Singapore barely ran beyond 4am. Hard Rock would have been closed by now but being ethnically exotic, we were prepared to take them anywhere they wanted to go. I whipped out my altruistic card and decided to progress the night by winging for LB. Turns out they were sisters and despite size 6 jeans and lack of ample breast, their value shot up almost instantaneously. If there was anything that toppled having Koreans, it was having sisters.

We waited endlessly in the car for the rest and it was a case of mismatched numbers. 8 people and one Saab 95. We only needed to be related for this to be a typical Jamaican village story. Yes, we're hoping to rewrite records here.

The journey was painful and expectedly so since this was almost like some refugee smuggling replica. LB's chick was Kate and the other was Vicky. I yelled at LB to pedal the gas because an unknown object was crushing my toes. Dek was complaining that his legs were numb but that was because Kate was sitting on him. My toes were crushed and NO ONE was sitting on me! In all the unavailability of space and pronounced discomfort, Flower was actually sleeping.

We detoured to Zeekay's place for drinks. I started picturing a wild night already. We drowned the two sisters with super concentrated Absolute Kurant with F&N Grape mixers, dimmed the lights, played some music and the party was re-ignited. Vicky was sloshed by the time we did the third round and Kate had gone out for smokes with LB. Flower and Zeekay disappeared, Soumi was visibly bored and before I know it, I was left in the room with Vicky and Dek.

Dek eventually moved in on Vicky and thinking he wanted the chick, I excused myself for the toilet. I left them to join the others outside and unwittingly locked ourselves out of the house. Well done, I have to be some idiot! Kate wasn’t the slightest bit thrilled that her sister was left inside alone and demanded we had the Dek open up the door for us.

Dek picked up my first call, said "Okay, I’m coming" and never showed. This only escalated Kate’s panic and our attempts to calm her down was futile. She's either

a) Unaware that Singapore has a low crime rate and people don’t just rape people by locking everyone else out of the house. Or

b) Jealous that her younger, less attractive sister is getting some tonight while she isn’t. LB and me picked option B.

We headed to the back to peer through the window to see what was going on and we see her on top of him and she just pulled her top back down. It was clear why he never showed up at the door; she was sitting on him. Kate rushed over shouting some hysterics through the window. Suddenly, everything was going bad.

Kate was pissed and wanted to head back, and since we figured this to be damage control, volunteered to take them back to Chinatown. Midway, Kate mumbled something about having to go to Punggol, then got out of the car in the middle of the road and hailed a cab and requested that we sent her sister home. I said, “Hoo shit.. that was weird.”

LB: “Why do these things always happen to us?”
Me: “I don’t know. But I made out with Vicky at her door.”
LB: “You are a fucker..”