The New Years Countdown

Having never been to a foam party before, and hearing rather positive feedbacks from various sources, I decide that i shall end my year jumping around a makeshift pool with hundreds of other half naked strangers. It sounds good already. Water, foam, girls and music, quite the ingredient for sucess.

The only down side is, every other sleazy fuck face douche bag guy has the same idea. Signs that were telling of a disaster as we get there.

a) The place is packed with an uncanny domination of one gender
b) The whatever remains of the female population generally fell under 'Short, fat, flat and ugly'
c) Possibly a mass Bangladeshi excursion

I can figure out the first two phenomenons. Firstly, as i tell LB and Dek, "Any self respecting woman will not be here." That is to say, any woman with a decent sex life and attraction will not need to come for a foam party in hope of getting groped. Secondly, men are low life scums. Foam parties are calender events to outrightly challenge the limits of molestation. If i had a girlfriend, I'll NEVER bring her within 10metres of a foam party. That place is easily filled with closet molesters. I'll get into this later.

Its new year, i shant even be racist, but certain things i have to say. The foam pool is roughly the size of an Olympic sized pool. At any given time, I'm guessing theres about 200plus people in the sand pit of a pool. Of this, Bangladeshi's have enough number to legitimately register as a third gender. You know their ambiguity if u've been to Serangoon Road. I got fucking groped by them!

I don't blame them, considering that there was probably 20 females in there, the 10:1 ratio means that if you cant have the girls, then going for the pretty boys with the long hairs are the next best alternative. We are easily one of the best looking people in the pool, i guess its only norm then that I get grope, by men.

Let me break down how the whole foam-molest thing works. Firstly, a male (im not being racist, but u guys should know who im referring to), will stalk the prey (generally a woman). He stands behind her and waits for her to charge into the foam as it falls down, of which the hands fly out swiftly. I see this girl groped by at least 5 guys with her bikini top in disarray as she emerges from the foam. And this girl is FAT and UGLY. I'm serious, I won't even poke her with a stick and any self respecting male shouldn't too, but i guess foam parties are Communist products, they give ugly people a chance to feel normal.

Some fuck tries to pickpocket Dek and gets caught by him. There was a fight in the foam pool, with one group beating up the non-chinese guy. The dickhead was bleeding from the temple, nose and mouth. Thats what happens when you molest another man's meat. We counted down to a sombre NY..yawn. Then head to KM8 for Space Ibiza. Two words. 'No.people'. Thank God we didn't go there in the beginning.

On the whole, Sentosa blows. We left at about 2am for Rochester Drive to meet Draco and some other friends. Along the way we pull up to this Tuscani with two chicks in there. We start smiling at them and they wave back, so i make conversation. Since one of them was pretty cute from where i was sitting.

Me: "Where you guys headin' "
GirlDriver: "We're going to makan. Prata."
Me: "What? So early? Not partying?"
GirlDriver: "No, going to eat at Pasir Panjang, wanna join us? My friends are up ahead waiting for us.."

The light turns green and LB speeds off. Maybe people are only friendly during new year.

We end up heading to Loof after Rochester to meet another group of girls, then 15mins later, we head to Zouk with Flower and the other girls. Since its New Years Eve, Flower cant sign me in which means i have to pay $38 to enter the place at 3.30am, but she introduces me to a group of girls, some of whom i've already met cos they're Eugg's friends too. Lee comes out to find me and tells me the music is awesome. Dek and LB aren't too keen on going in, i say "Fuck it, I'm going in..". Perhaps the best move all night.

I go in to find Lee and my other friends playing 5-10 over Long Island. I'll seriously deliberatley fuck up every round just to drink it. With enough fuel, we head to the dance floor. The last thing i'll want is to fuck a random chick on NYE, so I'm strictly dancing tonight. It always helps that the DJ is playing really hard music, and I mean REALLY hard.

4.56am: LB suggest we stay till 10am. I think its a swanky idea. I start cheering.
5.20am: Dek says Macs breakfast at 7am. I think its a good idea. I start cheering.
6.06am: All of us are tired, we head back. I think its a great idea. Im too tired to cheer.

Given a chance, I'd say i won't want it any other way. Although the foam party stank really bad, literaly also, I always wanted to know how it felt. Now i can say, "Been there, done that, got my ass groped, nothing to shout about really."