Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Butterfly goes Genting

My name is Butterfly, I have no redeeming qualities and I'm an idiot..

If you've delved into my stories well enough, you should know by now that I have serious issues with alcohol. I am a drinker without moderation, that word is taboo.. when juice kisses my lips, there's no end to it. However, the absence of moderation in my life is not just limited to alcohol and great sex, I'm as of the pass couple days, an implusive gambler.

This is my story..

This Genting trip was conceived on the eleventh hour, against my initial concern that the time span from our return on Wednesday to our departure for Taiwan on Friday would pose some problems, given that,

1. I havent changed a single cent for the trip.
2. We haven't done research on where to party.
3. I've not packed shit.

P.S: This is a request. I need you guys to give me places to party in Taiwan, or places of interest that you'll think I'll enjoy. This is last min, but it beats me having to search the net. Drop me a mail, post a comment or tell it to me on MSN. I'll be thankful and if it does turn out fun, I'll promise to buy you a drink when I get back on the 30th.

Anyway, we head up to Genting, disregarding the possibility of fucking up the Taiwan trip. Life is all about last minute decisions. Anticipation is boring, we should all live for the moment. Think less, do more. Unless of cos this is regarding rubberless sex, then you should practise self control. It's not funny waking up one day with cauliflowerson your dick.

Bear with me with this hasty entry because I have no time to write this.

I head up with my motley crew of vice subscribers. Pappy, Poks, Round Eyes and LB. The agenda is simple, there's only one thing to do in Genting, that's the roller coaster rides. I travelled 6 hours by bus so that I can thrill myself with 2 storey high kiddy roller coaster rides that make taking escalator look really dangerous and scary. No..

Naturally, the only thing worth making such a trip up is the casino. If you read my post on my trip to Australia, you'll know that I'm quite an implusive gambler, and when I start losing money, I think everything is a good idea.

The First Day

In half an hour, I've won $500, which isn't alot but I didn't plan much on gambling. I did this with a $50 bet and doubled it for two rounds then decide $200 is too little to cash out, and that I should try to hit $1000. Everyone else is losing money.

There's this dealer, Suki, that we love. Largely because she's quite cute and has horrible luck. RoundEyes starts looking for dealers with unlucky names to bet with. If you understand Hokkien, Suki is roughly translated as 'lose all'.

We return to the casino later that night. BAD IDEA. The guys start winning bets against Suki again and this tempts me. I start placing $50 bets. Suki clears the table with a win. I bet again, and lose. I change more money and lose them faster than losing an erection. That Bitch! I think changing more money is a good idea, what a fucking idiot I am. After 5 rounds, I've lost ALL my day winnings and some additional cash. I decide maybe its better to hit on unsuspecting sugar mummies at the tables instead. At the rate I'm going, I'll to be broke and have to spend my holiday in the hotel room wanking off to Vision Four movies.

Day 2

Despite the slight setback, LB and I treat ourselves for a spa package. Read: SPA. No hanky panky, everything is clean and upmarket. You'll know a spa is decent when all the masseuse are ugly. There's this inverted co-relation to looks and skill of massage, I take one look at her and know that I'm in for the best Balinese massage in ALL of Genting. Normally, I won't let ugly people so much as touch me, let alone rub me when I'm lying in bed half naked. Thankfully, a hot towel over your eyes and alot of imagination does wonders.

We make a return to the casino. I decide to bet cautiously against Suki again. Reminding myself that I have to bet small so that I won't run the risk of burning out for the rest of the day. I start with $10.. I lose, then decide to bet $25. I lose again, Suki is slaughtering everyone on the table. Fuck the small bets, I start raising my bets to $50. In four hands, I've lost everything down to my last $100.

Pappy tells me to stop, which is only logical given my run of bad luck. What do I do? I decide $100 is too little for me to make the trip to the cashier to cash out and betting everything is a better idea. Pappy is very against this and starts telling me to be rational. That's not me. I like to live with consequences constantly fucking me in the ass over my actions. Two words, "Pays.Off"

In one hand, I make back all that I've lost. I should really stop now that I've recouped. This option lies before me and beckons me to leave in the black. Fuck that, I decide to play on. This turns out to be the best decision I've made since telling Ivory to fuck off from my life. In 8 games, I'm up $500. I am a genius. I shall henceforth be called, the King of Casino Wars. I do not speak to lesser men.

Pappy, Poks and me head to the disco there, along with a female friend of Poks. I open a bottle of wine. One bottle and a few glasses of beer later, alcohol is my best deterent against gambling. Its better to be drunk, I order another bottle and tell Pappy to stop me it I start throwing cash away on juice again.

Poks friend is the kind of girl who has a repressed life. You can tell from her enthusiam to club even at horrible disco and her tolerance to alcohol being solely vodka. At one point she tells me that she doesn't drink much and not to order too much.

Me: "You don't know me. Alcohol is my best friend."

I can't remember some of the other stuff I said to her, but one was asking her is she was a Christian and then telling her,

Me: "I have no morals, I have to warn you that. You must never impose morals on me."

In my intemperate indulgence in alcohol, I blow all my money on juice. In my alcohol induced state of retardism, I think I make a great investment move in dumping all my winnings on wine and hard liquor. Everything is perfect, I start going over to the DJ console and tell the DJ, in verbatim

Me: "Are you going to play RnB trash all night? I really need some Tiesto."

The DJ immediately takes my request and with enough juice in me to fuck doorknobs, I decide that hitting on the tomboyish DJ is perhaps the best way to cap my night, other than flirting with Poks' friend. The DJ loves me and attempts to take my contact number. I celebrate my achievements, I might be the first guy that tried to flirt with her.

I head up to the casino half drunk to meet LB and RoundEyes. When I'm high and there's a cute girl infront of me, I leave nothing to chance. I start talking rubbish to Suki and in the ensuing conversation of me half slurring in Mandarin, I ask her for drinks with us after her shift.

She tells us to meet her at 5am. I take a quick glance at the time, 1 and a 1/2 hours more.. I might not last the night. We head off to the other casino at our hotel and I fall alseep at the jackpot machine, in the midst of checking out a babe at the table. Fuck, I'm definitely not going to last the night. I tell LB I'm heading back to the room but will be there at 5am later.

I wake up about 2 hours later and decide no chick is worth having me to forgo sleep over. The guys did meet up with her, and from what I hear, she's very cute and friendly. It's angled to a point where it seems that I missed out. Fuck it, I drooled in my sleep, had my contacts heavily dried up in my eyes and tripped over clothes on the floor while going to toilet in the dark. Nothing beats that. I say so.

Edit: We went to the theme park in the day. I left this out because I'm a pussy when it comes to thrill rides. For real, as much as I love telling you how much I rule and why everyone should love me, I'm a hamster. The thing is, I'm acrophobic.. neither do I like the feeling of having my balls in my throat. I can't breathe or scream when I fall, so anything more than 5 secs of falling has a high chance of killing me. If you laugh at me, I will have you killed. I'm a trained ninja.

Day 3

I wake up 11.30 the next morning, in the same clothes I was in hours ago. I turn to see the room empty, LB is missing. I call RoundEye's room.

Me: "Where's LB?"
RoundEyes: "I dunno.. I'm sleeping..."
Me: "Is there anyone in the room?"
RoundEyes: "I dunno.. I'm sleeping.."
Me: "What the FUCK do you mean you dunno. JUST TURN AND TAKE A FUCKING LOOK!!"
RoundEyes: "Yea.. someone is lying on my bed..."

I hang up and go for a quick shower. We have to check out at 12noon and LB is missing..

3mins later, I get a knock on my door. I open to see LB in his undies and shoes, holding his jeans standing outside my door. This is the classic LB demeanour.

Me: "Where the fuck did you go?!"
LB: "I dunno... I was sleeping.."

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